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Hi guys. I'm new to the community and LJ. This is what it boils… - Weightloss Support For PCOS [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
Weightloss Support For PCOS

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[Mar. 12th, 2009|12:59 am]
Weightloss Support For PCOS
Hi guys. I'm new to the community and LJ.

This is what it boils down to. In the last year I've gained 50 lbs, which brings my total weight at the moment to 250 lbs. I'M ALMOST 300 LBS. and the worst part is that I CAN'T CONTROL WHAT I EAT. God. this is so awful. I can't even put this into words. I'm disgusting. Ive gained so much weight over the last few years that my body is starting to look deformed. I have this fupa that just hangs and is so gross. I can't live like this!!!! I'M DISGUSTING!!! I don't know what else to do. I need something to surpress my appetite, because I eat everything. EVERYTHING. I had 2 cupcakes today, 2 snowballs, 2 hot pockets, 1 24 oz bottle of pepsi, a small bag of chips, 2 malt drinks and a lowfat yogurt.....and the worst part is that i'm not even hungry i just eat it coz it's there.

I'm gonna die if I keep going like this. The man of my dreams has just come back into my life after  more than 7 years of being gone by the way of the internet and i'm petrified to meet him because I've gotten so big. I don't understand what's wrong with me. I see myself in the mirror everyday and it doesn't stop me. I KNOW that i'm a fat disgusting pig, I see the way people look at me in the street, I'm even afraid to eat in public. I need help and I don't know where to turn. I'm so down and so lost and so depressed.

i Don't even think I'm asking for a lot. I would be happy at 170 lbs at this point......

someone please say something, anything, I just want to know that I'm not alone....

i'm in tears.

Has anyone else ever felt like this?

I mean jesus with having PCOS, or at least I'm 99% positive that I have it, it's not like I don't already have a billion other things to be insecure about.

I want the old me back

I want to be myself again.

[User Picture]From: brigid
2009-03-12 07:37 am (UTC)
i would suggest going to see an obgyn to get a definitive diagnosis and then going forward from there. self diagnosis isn't good in that there are a whole host of endocrhin problems aside from pcos that could be going on that may need addressing. in addition there are a few medications for pcos patients that do help with weight loss.
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[User Picture]From: evergrey
2009-03-12 07:40 am (UTC)
I would suggest that you go to a doctor and see about getting a Welbutrin prescription. It will help with depression and appetite. I also thing you really need to get some counseling. Saying these things about yourself, thinking about yourself this way is very destructive and worrisome.
Also go shopping with a friend there to support you, and only buy healthy foods. But really, try anti depressants that reduce appetite and get counseling. Sometimes a person really needs to go to the pros, and there's no shame in that.
Being yourself is a state of mind. It's how you think, how you identify yourself. You bio is all about your weight. Get help, and focus on other aspects of your life.
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[User Picture]From: andabusers
2009-03-12 09:36 am (UTC)
I have felt like that. It's not a nice feeling.

Don't be so hard on yourself; I second that you might want to think about counselling. It's reeeeally hard to be good to yourself and make yourself healthy if you don't even like yourself .. You deserve respect, from yourself included, and to be looked after. You already know that all these things you're eating are damaging you, but why would you want to damage yourself? You don't deserve that.
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[User Picture]From: wolfmare
2009-03-12 10:18 am (UTC)
For you the first step might be making sure things like that *aren't* there. I'm a bit of a compulsive eater and that's the only way I can make myself eat healthily. Cupcakes, snowballs, regular soda? Toss them! Don't buy anymore! If you live with someone else (parents/roommate/spouse/kids/whoever) that buys it, make them hide the stuff for now. And absolutely don't go looking for it.

Yes, I've felt like this. I hit 233 lbs on a 5'5" frame and realized that I was eating anything that passed under my nose. I was bored, or hey, it tasted good! That's all the reason I need, right?

I'm alone all day with nobody but a dog and two cats for company, so nobody was ever there to tell me "You're eating AGAIN?!" I put on 40 pounds in a year, and when another 20 piles on in six months I decided enough was enough.

Go see your doctor. Explain the situation, explain what you think is part of the problem (PCOS) and explain the rest of the problem (compulsion). They deal with this regularly, they can help!

BUT, in the end, you have to start watching what you grab for. It's okay to snack throughout the day, but make your snacking vegetables instead of sweets. Or even fruit, which can be awesomely sweet without so many awful processed sugars. It's not impossible to change what you eat, you just have to replace unhealthy foods for ones you can eat without the guilt.

See if your doc will refer you to a counselor and psych(ologist or iatrist, either would be fine). Again, they deal with this quite often and know how rough it can be. Be as open with them as you were with us... Heck, print this post and show them! We're all rooting for you here, but you have to get help that's qualified to deal with this, all the good intentions in the world don't add up to good medical knowledge.

Hope some of this helps... And you aren't alone.
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From: carmenbello
2009-03-12 07:35 pm (UTC)
yes! it has tremendously. I just have to wait til mid april to see my doctor since he's so ridiculously booked. It sucks but you've made me feel so much better. Last night was just a really horrible,awful night for me. Today's not as bad. I just keep telling myself that if I take it one day at a time, things can only get better.
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[User Picture]From: wolfmare
2009-03-12 09:47 pm (UTC)
Take it one day at a time... And find veggies that you like. Glad you're feeling better. Saw your post this morning before I'd had my daily cuppa coffee and felt compelled to reply.

I do know what it's like, and I know the hardest thing in the world is realizing and admitting you're at fault for something. I still fight myself about wanting to snack on things constantly, even when I'm not hungry.

It took me going on WeightWatchers (NOT a membership, but still following their diet) and keeping track of my 'points' on a whiteboard in the kitchen to get me to notice what and when I was trying to eat. And by putting it in the kitchen, I have to walk past and see it every time I grab for food. And I mark the full amount of the food, then knock points off if I don't finish something. Meh, it works, but might not be for you. Still, an idea.

It's hard. It's a struggle, if not a full out fight, to learn new habits. But it's worth it. And there are people here for you, and me too for that matter. So you don't have to go it alone.
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[User Picture]From: seriously_so
2009-06-01 03:46 pm (UTC)
you've just got to get all those bad, tempting foods out of the house. if it's not there, it won't be something you can easily get to, so you won't eat it.
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[User Picture]From: beezyandsteezy
2012-02-29 12:14 am (UTC)
My best friend and I just started a blog together because we are both trying to lose weight. I started my journey in December. I was 255 pounds when I started and today I am 234 pounds. My friend was diagnosed with stage 2 diabetes yesterday, she thought for sure that her doctor was going to diagnose her with PCOS and instead she got the news that she has diabetes. Her doctor told her that it's reversible if she loses weight and gets healthy. We both are doing Weight Watchers and I've watched my mom shrink from a size 16 to a size 4 by using Ww. I HIGHLY recommend it. You really can eat just about anything you want, you just have to count it! It's a wonderful program and IT WORKS! You just have to find your motivation and do it. If you want to lose weight, you can. Just set your mind to it! Please, feel free to follow us and read our blog. We can help you along! We can do it together!! I have faith in you, now you just need to find it in yourself!
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